Sunday, February 21, 2010

Radiation Photos...and what I look like now

I AM FINISHED! No more radiation for me...ever. Radiation is a "one shot deal" meaning that even if the cancer comes back, it will have to be treated another way. Not that we are focusing on the cancer coming back...because it's NOT. With all the people praying for me, it wouldn't dare!

Now, don't be scared by some of the photos that I am posting. We wanted to get some photos of the radiation process, my lovely mask, and what I look like now that radiation is completed. They aren't exactly the most flattering pictures. Even though these past couple of weeks weren't exactly the best of times, we still want to remember all that we can from what God taught us and how He healed me.

First off, a few photos of how cancer took over our home. The counter next to the sink and the cupboard above was overflowing with meds, syringes, Ensure, vitamins, and yes even lovely items like Maalox and Milk of Magnesia. What can I say, cancer isn't exactly glamorous! You see all those red bottles in the cupboard? All mine. See the bottles full of morphine? Mine. Boxes of fentanyl patches? Yeah, mine. Everything here is mine. And all were used on a daily basis. I still have lost track of how many prescriptions I am on.
And then the dresser in the bedroom, where my nightly meds were dispensed and my dressing on my feeding tube was changed. Every night, Nurse Jason would transport all of my needed meds upstairs and keep my chart updated. He's the best male nurse in the world!This is the radiation room where I spent M-F, 15 minutes per day for almost seven weeks. That is my mask laying on the table. The radiation lights would surround me and rotate throughout the sessions.
Here I am being lifted closer to the lights on the fancy schmancy table.
And this is the creepiest picture of all. This is me strapped into my mask. Can you see now why I would struggle with claustrophobia?? You can see the curve of my nose and then there is a mouthpiece underneath the mask that is holding my mouth open and my tongue perfectly still. I kinda look like a corpse, don't I? The hard, plastic mesh is pushed up directly on to my skin. I usually had "waffle face" when I was finished.
This was me after a few days of treatment and into second week of chemo. Just starting to burn and have sore lips, but really doing just fine.
And this is me now, red beard and all. I decided to wear my stripes with pride. Lost about 35 pounds,* gained new perspective on my life, gained new attitude and appreciation for the goodness of God.
*Just a friendly reminder, if you say I am "lucky" or you are "jealous" because I lost weight then I will punch you in the face. In love, of course :)
Here is our "before" family picture during Christmas...
And again, here we are now. You might notice a trend with the boy. He's not exactly cooperative.
Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart for your prayers. The way you all rallied around me and cheered me through was amazing. I have the best support system. Thank you for joining us on this cancer journey!

23 comments:

Jenna M said...

Oh Angie...I am so glad you are finished. You still look beautiful, even with the red beard!
Praying that you feel a little bit better each day.
Love you lots.

Dorothy said...

What an amazing journey... thank you so much for allowing us to "peek" in and see what you were going thru, and for the updates that kept us more informed on how to pray more effectively for you. Angie, that meshy mask is freaky and honestly, I can't believe you waited 6 of the 7 weeks to ask us for prayer for that specifically! But you are OVER and done with that and I am so glad that the Lord has revealed Himself to you in ways you never dreamed of, and that He brought you through...stronger. More courageous. And ready to battle whatever else life may throw at you. You will definitely be a blessing to many, as you seek to use your experiences for His glory. Jason, what a man. For showing us how to love and care for your wife, I'm sure you will have your own ways to share what God has done for you. And Brady? He will not remember anything except for pictures and how you share him what transpired! So grateful to know you both and to have entered into the privilege of sharing in your suffering through prayer. God bless you always. Love in Christ, Dottie vahcic

Anonymous said...

I think you look beautiful. Thank you for your sweet spirit and for sharing your life with us.

Linda Wilson

Anonymous said...

Angie, you are fabulous! So is Jason! You have to know we all - OK, maybe only me! - really wanted to see and understand what it is you have been going through. Not that we can know, but thank you so much for letting us see.
We love you and will continue to pray for you all.
XOX Alice H.

Kathy said...

Angie - you have taught me so much and I am so thankful for you. Thank you for sharing your story with us, even the little details. I love you! I can't wait to meet you in person some day!

Ashlee said...

Angie, I am so glad you are done!! We'll keep praying for you and Jason and Brady too. Thank you for letting us enter your home and your life with your photos and for always being so honest.

The Essons said...

Angie -I am so proud of you! You are so beautiful inside and out -I admire you so much and am incredibly thankful that the Lord has blessed me with you!

Roxie said...

I am praising God with you and writing this as tears stream down my face. Having gone through this, I know how awesome the feeling is...although the burn still persists! What a victory, what an amazing battle won! I am so happy for you. I thank you for sharing this time with us. I feel so part of your life, so close to your fight. It is also preparing me for what my ex's father is going to go through. I love you guys. Now Brady can enjoy his mommy! God is so good.

Kim Ferguson said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kim Ferguson said...

You are SUCH a trooper! I love how you are giving God all the glory!!!
I am very proud of you and so very excited that you are finished!

I love you.

Anonymous said...

Well, I have to say, welcome to the end of the radiation race! you finished well with the support of the body of Christ! I am glad you are out of it. I hope and pray that the rest of the recovery goes well. May the Lord continue to bless you as He is glorified through this. Well, it's off to homework for me. God bless! Keep on Keeping On! - btw, I hope you will post a blog in the future talking about what the Lord taught you through this trial, I would like to learn from you myself. Growing to be like Jesus is an amazing thing. Well, ttyl, and God bless!

- Steven Manning

Rose R said...

Angie - you are an amazing woman and have an amazing husband! What a journey you've been through. You've been surrounded with love and prayers the whole time and I know the Lord has already used your trials to be an encouragment to others. I'm continuing to pray for you, Jason and little Brady.

Kari said...

Praise the Lord, it's over- your little red face looks cute!! Thanks for sharing with us your pix (love the purple band from Target, my chosen color as well) and all of your prayer needs. That mask looks so scary, no wonder you felt like that!

So proud of you Ange!! Love and hugs from CO!

Sternberg Family said...

Hooray--it's over! You are a survivor Angie. Your strength and spirit and above all,your unwavering faith are truly inspiring. I continue to pray that God's healing touch will comfort you and restore your health. ...and from one Mom to another, Brady will be OK. (You know this, but sometimes it's nice to hear from someone else) Thanks for your openness about your life and sharing the details. I feel honored to know you again.
Praying,
Emily

Andres Sgv said...

I admire you and thanks for sharing.

Anonymous said...

Angie,
As I started looking through the pictures of how you look now, I didn't know what to expect, but you look great.

Sorry I can't be at the H. R. tomorrow. I have a standing appt. every two weeks on Mon. A. M.

BLESSINGS TO ALL OF YOU,

MARY J.

Nancy Foley said...

Dear Angie and Jason,

We have been following your blog for a long time and are amazed in your strength. What a wonderful faith you both have. You look just as pretty with red stripes as you do with none. Prince of Peace Catholic Church in Clinton, Iowa have been praying for you for many months and will continue. God bless all of you.

Nancy and Bill Foley ( friends of Connie and Dave.)

Don & Jen Slagle said...

So very glad that this chapter is over. Those photos really put things into perspective. I can totally understand how you could feel claustrophobic during radiation. It's 2010 and they haven't found something less primitive than that get-up, huh? :-) You are so brave & we love you for your humor throughout this fight! Praying for you and continued healing!!

El Jefe said...

That settles it. I look the best with a beard in the family. Also, if you wanted to make some extra cash I'm sure you could find some buyers for that morphine ;) SO happy you're all done.

Anonymous said...

Congrats on finishing the radiation! Following your battle has been so inspirational. Praise the Lord for how well things have gone!

the keith fam said...

My favorite part of reading your blog is seeing what completely crazy comment Jeff DeArment leaves. Ya gotta love brothers :)

So proud of you and all you have overcome. You look beeeeeeeeautiful! and the crazy boy, he is so cute too :) Miss you! Love you!

sonshinymom said...

Bless your heart for posting these pics! Even if they aren't flattering they are REAL LIfE pictures. The kind of stuff we usually never forget for the rest of our lives. You are beautiful and I love your cute curly hair! :) I am SO glad you are done with radiation! I am pretty sure that mask would make me super closterphobic too. That looks scary. You are so brave!

Anonymous said...

Hi Angie- I just wanted to say what a wonderful blessing it has been to get to know you through your website and at church. God has truly taken his majesty to another level with the way He has brought you through this whole ordeal. Praise be to the Lord for He is righteous and all knowing! Everyone worries about their weight, either good or bad, but it was a blessing for you to have the extra few pounds because it pulled you through and made sure your body was better equipped to handle the situation. I know you will be a healthier person because of this experience- and will appreciate life in a new way. Don't worry about what people think of you- God is the one who matters.
In Christian Love- Karen B.